January 4th, 2015
What to do when we feel angry
The Way Past Anger
Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath.
Anger often comes from feeling guilty about something or from feeling powerless to change a particular circumstance. The pain is there and when you can listen beyond the anger to the message underneath you may hear a message like....."Please tell me that I believe about myself is not true."
Our beliefs about ourselves tend to dominate our actions. Although this is a simple concept, the trick is that the beliefs are often below the conscious level. Therefore, when I am working from the belief that I am not good enough, for instance, everything I see will be tainted with that belief. However, if I don't recognize the belief then I will inevitably blame someone or something else for what is happening. A ripe moment for us to get angry.
Although it is common to get angry, the trick is not to justify it or to blame someone else. It is ideal to acknowledge that I am mad or angry and then stop! Don't blame or attack. Just sit with the anger and listen
. What is underneath it? Often there is hurt or pain or sadness of some sort. What is this and where does it come from? What am I making this mean about me?
When I can identify what is creating the anger in me then I can learn to let it go and relate to others with compassion and kindness.